Invite me in

My Mama tells me stories of a church her and my Daddy attended when they were in their early years of marriage. She said that each week, a different family from the church would put lunch in the crock pot at home, ready to invite a guest over. If a guest was at church that morning, the ready family would invite them over for a home cooked meal. She said their church grew tremendously during those years.

As Austin and I moved away from our home, from our friends and family and church; we are starting to get a glimpse into the world of hospitality and understanding it in a new way. We, who are so far away from everything, long to be included ... in anything. It would absolutely make our entire month if someone would simply invite us over for lunch.

Looking for a new church community is a hard, sometimes painful process. If you have ever moved, or needed to find a new church for any reason at all, perhaps my words will resonate with you.

"Welcome to our church, if you are a guest today, please don't put anything in the offering ... fill out the information card in front of you and take it to the hospitality desk following the service (or drop it in the basket, hand it to the usher, leave it on your seat etc.) We have a free gift we would like to give you, we wont solicit your name..."

We have turned in the cards. We have given our name. We have sent emails. We have received the "gifts," the free coffee, the worship CD, Our Daily Bread Devotional ... We have received a lot of "Wow, you moved from OR-E-GUN? It's snowing there right?" We've gotten the, "We have a lot of men with beards here, you will really fit in." "Do you have children? No? ... Well when you do, we have a great children's department!" We have met people with firm grasps and people with flimsy handshakes. We have met people who looked us in the eye, and people who eyed us up and down.

What we have not yet received is an invitation for lunch.

And I know this is like against our culture. I know we are not in the Middle East, the magical place where strangers invite strangers in for tea. I know that we need to put ourselves out there. But of all the "free gifts" we have received, what we would really love is someone to have lunch with.

At each of the churches we have been too, we have straight out said "We are new, were looking for friends,  they don't even need to be our age, what do your small groups look like?" And we have been referred to the website. Every. Single. Time.

Now, I am not trying to gripe about churches here, because I really could write another blog on the great things about each of the churches, but I think something needs to change about the way that we as the American Church run our "hospitality desks." Most people are not looking for a free pamphlet about your church, most people, if they are new, are looking for someone to eat lunch with.

I write these words and feel guilt rushing over me like a broken shower. How many people have I instinctively shaken hands with on a Sunday Morning and never once invited them out? What makes it worse, is that I can think of times when I thought of asking people over for a meal, but I justified it with statements like:

"I am having lunch with my friends today, bringing someone new would be weird."
"I was planning on a quite day at home."
"Maybe if I see them again next Sunday?"
"Maybe someone else is taking them to lunch."
"Maybe they don't want to go out to lunch with me."
"I have too many people in my life, I don't have room for anyone new."

Its that last one I think that usually gets me stuck. But this time, I am the one that doesn't have enough  people in my life, and I wish I knew someone that I could invite over for lunch.

I guess this is an urging, to be open to sharing a meal with someone you don't know. To ask a guest at your church if they have lunch plans. I know that I am waiting for the opportunity to turn this around and ask someone to join in a meal with me. And when I do, I will let you know.

"For I was hungry, and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in. For whatever you do for the least of these, you do for me." - Matthew 25:25